From the article: Plus-Size Modeling Agencies
How many times have you been told that you "have a pretty face," but you could really make the most of it if you were smaller? How did you respond? Share the Truth
gahh!
- Alright, everytime I hear the word you have such a beautiful face, in the back of my mind I think BUT... You're too fat! Guess what? I don't care!! This "compliment" is actually like an insult to me. I might loose weight some day, BUT I'm happy just how I am. Which is different from a lot of skinny girls, calling their thighs jiggly, or they have a food baby... They will never be as confident in their skin as I am, fat and all!
- —Guest Angela
so often
- i have always been told that i should go into plus size modelling because i have a very preety face, good skin and although i am a size 24 have a good shape. but lets face it this world is far to shallow to let a size 24 woman be on a front cover!!!
- —Guest ally
No
- I have not been given the BUT.People tell me how ma eyes look so pretty and it is like I have fake eye lashes because they are so long
- —BoitshepoMasimege
Story of My Life
- Every day. No Joke. I'm always told I have such a beautiful face and that they would kill to have my hair. They say I could be a model, if I would just loose some weight. I agree I could loose some weight to be healthier, but like everyone says, I am beautiful. Rolls and all.
- —Guest MandyLu
you may be big but...
- I was always slim until my twenties when the battle of the bulge began and I started the diet binge diet life style but now I don't diet and am 44 and over weight and i get told "you may be big but you have a pretty face and good skin"
- —Guest Alison
if only...
- when i was in high school i was in marching band with a bunch of my friends. One day one of my friends dads who had yet to meet me walked up and said "You are so pretty, if only you weren't so fat". I sat there and thought really? As if I didn't get that enough from kids my age I had to get it from my friend's dad too? It's truley pathtic that an adult could tell that to a sixteen year old girl.
- —Guest stormygrl56
Pretty Face, But..."?
- LOL @ this one. I never got the but at the end of the compliment but the compliment ended there. The distinction between "you have such a pretty face" and "you are pretty" had obvious implications: The only pretty thing about you IS your face. So the sting still existed. Also, I used to get the "you have such a pretty face" at 265-270 lbs. I lost about 35 lbs and while still not anywhere near my ideal weight, I feel good about me. And I project that. I know it shows. Because I am more confident, I dont feel as sluggish or sloppy. THAT is what people respond to. I no longer hear "you have such a pretty face" but now I hear "you are simply stunning" and "your presence is so powerful" and "wow". LOL I get so much attention now that at times I want to be left alone. So its a gift and a curse. The solution: Know yourself. Be happy with yourself. and above all surround yourself with those who KNOW and love you. Then you will know youre beautiful and others will too. great pos
- —Guest Erika
pretty... but!!!
- ah, yes... the you have SUCH a pretty face.... BUT.... remark!! at times, i've replied, "thank you... and you're so charming, except for your foot in mouth disease!"... and "thank you, and i'm twice the woman you'll ever hope to be!"... remember, beauty comes, and beauty goes, but stupid lasts forever!!!!!!
- —Guest tuxey
You are pretty but...
- I have heard that and I have always hated that comment alot... I mean *for crying out loud* just say I am pretty... nice...fat!!! what not but why compliment me and then hurt my feelings.... I guess people tend to gie their own *unrequested* comments!!!
- —Guest tplusf
Look, but don't really see me
- I never get the "oh you have a pretty face, but...", because, well, because I don't have a pretty face, but whatever. What I get is the "I like that top" or "and your clothes always fit you so well", yes, that's called a visit with the tailor, it's not magic. Or people compliment me on my makeup, shoes, bag, jewlery, or some other thing I happen to have on my body, without actually saying anything about my actual size, shape, lack of shape, and I often go to great (and greatly absurd) lengths to wear accessories, items of clothing, that people will comment on, because I have this insane idea that if they're paying attention to the bag, the shoes, the purple eye shadow with a swipe of grey liner, they're not noticing, or they're spending less time noticing, the tummy bulge, the too-ample backside, the jiggly upper arms.
- —Dahlia21
pretty face but...
- i met a guy in my first year at the university who claimed he liked me but i wasn't into him.the day he told me,.."you are pretty but try and lose some weight,was all i needed to push him out of my life.
- —Guest medandiya
oh the times I've heard that line
- I don't think anyone would dare say something like that to me now. I used to take it, but as I became and adult and I realized my mother couldn't ground me I began telling people what I thought of their attitudes when they said stuff like that to me. I suppose I am a bit scary. :) Nowadays, I usually just say thank you and ignore the rest.
- —Guest fatchic
Prom pictures
- Today a coworker showed myself and another coworker his son's prom pictures. Several of the girls were plus sizes. The other coworker started in on them (she is very thin and used to model). "There is an obesity epidemic," she said and that they were too young to weigh that much when I objected pointing out that I weighed more than them (weight comes with age???). Anyway, she did use the "she has a pretty face" phrase with one of them. *sigh* I have personally had the "pretty face" experience once in the past, but I weighed a lot less. I have very, very low self esteem. Experiences like the one today still make me feel horrible, but mostly for the prom goers as they were obviously having a good time regardless of their weight (thin or plus size). And a male coworker made fun of another male coworker to me saying that he had put on weight and had a pot belly. I am really amazed at what people will say.
- —etaureau
"No Good"
- I was in Egypt meeting my extended family for the first time. My dad had immigrated to the United States in the 70's and we had never been in a position financially to travel to Egypt, so this entire trip was incredibly exciting for me. This particular evening we had settled down for dinner in my cousin’s fiancée’s parent’s home (it’ complicated, I know), and this is when it happened… My cousin’s future Mother-In-Law looked right at me and said in a thick Egyptian accent “You have the most beautiful face I have ever seen," (and I began to preen and gloat...prematurely, as it turned out), "BUT," she continued, "you are fat - that is no good.” Umm...Thanks? Not being entirely sure of the appropriate (and culturally acceptable) response, I smiled politely, finished my dinner, and laughed my ass off the second I left the room. Welcome to the family.
- —Guest Tracey S
You're so pretty...but....
- I don't know how many times I have heard this. From male and female alike, friends, and even family. I have been a curvy beautiful babe since I was ten years old and I always heard the words "cute" and "pretty" and of course "but". I used to let it bother me I found myself constantly feeling self conscious and maintained a self defeating personality and outlook on life and then one day I took a good long hard look at my self in the mirror and deep down into my soul. I still hear that line "you're so pretty but" but now, I brush it off, because in the end, what matters most is how you think of yourself. And personally, I think, feel, look and act as beautiful as I truly am, with no shame, no apologies and I certainly don't take the opinion of the doubters in my life personally.
- —Guest ApathyOne
Pretty Face and Confidence to boot!!
- You know, I haven't gotten this response since I was in Jr. High. A boy I liked told me that I have a pretty face, if it wasn't for being chubby. Can you imagine how devasating that could be to a 12 year old girl??!? I am a very beautiful "real-sized" woman, who not only has the pretty face, but the compassion and personality to go with it. I find that most people, men and women, are intimidated by my beautiful and confidence, even if I am almost 300 lbs. I have had people tell me I should model, but I don't put myself in that world where you are critized by your body. The people who I care about are the ones that matter and love me for who I am. Besides, I find that most men enjoy a real sized woman and love my curves. Too bad for the boy in school...his lost was the world's gain.
- —Guest MelissaKC
Back handed compliment
- I think that most people mean well when they say this. They are just trying to focus on soemthing positive. To me, it feels very much like a backhanded compliment, because to me it sounds like "you are so pretty, BUT..." But what? I can't be big and beautiful within myself? This goes for ANYONE who is different physically- skinny people, short people, handicapped people and even "ugly" people..we are all beautiful on our own way!!
- —Guest
